Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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