i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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