In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
