he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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