u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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