why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
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