ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
