i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
And then he peed in my hair
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