Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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