I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
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