If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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