he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Randomize
