i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
