It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
