hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
