we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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