I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
