i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
