She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
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