If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
