just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
We're hate flirting, damnit.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
