honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Randomize
