I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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