We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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