i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
