he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Randomize
