her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
