There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Randomize
