You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
