That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
