But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
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