I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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