I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I think my moral compass just broke
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
