you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Randomize
