is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
