Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I just found a bag of teeth...
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Randomize
