He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize
