im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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