Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
