a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Randomize
