next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Randomize
