Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
He's on the porch naked. Help.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
