I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
