He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
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