I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
