we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
