I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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