i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
