you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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