just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
